“Besides, it’s not like there will be any girls around to make them fell embarrassed,” he told me, as if the presence of girls were the only possible reason they wouldn’t want to play a game aimed at younger children. “What makes you assume their interest is in girls?” I asked. He could’ve told me [...] Read more »
Image taken from Walyou.com “You,” she said, a wry smile slipping slyly across her face, “are a logistical nightmare.” I can’t deny it. I’m rarely prepared and I like it that way. Though I may learn from my game-changing mistakes, I often choose to ignore the little ones that add just a touch of challenge. [...] Read more »
“Does anyone have a buck I can borrow?” “Sure, I do,” I said, reaching for my wallet. “Don’t do it, man,” Harold interjected. “He’ll ask for a pound of flesh in return.” — Jew jokes are my bread and butter. Generally people know I’m a Jew within the first hour they know me, and they [...] Read more »
“Well, yeah. It just makes sense,” I admitted. “Ok, follow-up question,” warned Matt. “Shoot.” “Would you say that’s sexist?” My immediate inclination was to say no, but even after discussing the topic for nearly an hour, there was still a shred of doubt in the back of my mind. It ate at me, gnawing on [...] Read more »
Assorted peppers and fairytale eggplant from Crescent Moon Farm. Taken from Figs with Bri. Hearing a Jew take Jesus’s name in vain doesn’t quite have the same gravity as when a Christian does it. There’s the immediate shock factor that the biggest name drop in the Western world just happened, but when I figure out [...] Read more »
Urethral catheters. In high school, I had some serious jaw surgery. They removed a sliver of bone from my upper jaw and reattached it, leaving me bloated and recovering for over a month. Because of the invasive nature of the procedure, they used a full anesthetic and installed a catheter. If you’re unfamiliar with the [...] Read more »
A bookshelf can say a lot about a person. At the very basic level, the quality of the book—paperback or hardcover, well-kempt or well-read, old edition or new—can show how much someone reads. Beyond that, titles and authors indicate inclinations and habits, be it harlequin romances and trashy science fiction or high brow philosophy and [...] Read more »
The beeping of my alarm is loud enough to be heard in the living room. If my grandfather is awake, as he usually is, he knows what that means. My computer screen flickers on as soon as I’m able to roll out of bed. It’s not to check email or read the latest news on [...] Read more »
Image by Matthew Olyphant. “That fucker,” I muttered under my breath, stuffing the signed credit card slip in with the others and pocketing the $0.43 tip. Mr. Felcher was a regular at BD’s Mongolian Barbecue. He often came in at lunch with his wife, ordering the beer and a bowl special (which got you a [...] Read more »
He didn’t weigh much, maybe a hundred and fifty pounds tops by my estimate. Given his short stature and slim build it wasn’t a surprise. His lack of tolerance wasn’t a surprise either. The way he drank, however, was. — Tipsy’s Liquor World towered in front of us, the Swiss chalet style architecture a pleasure [...] Read more »