Beard Poster by Michael Buchino of the Beard Revue. Sometimes, just when I think I’m used to it being gone, I feel my beard tingle and tickle, happiness in a fuzzy guise. But when I reach up to stroke it, it suddenly become clear: my beard is gone. I could regrow it, let the wilderness [...] Read more »
“Forgotten Mac” by Rob Dobi. They weren’t quite a corpses when I found them. they lay there lifeless, unmoving, but I could feel the warmth still emanating, steam slowly curling off the snow. There was a beauty to them; stoic, sad, dangerous. My first instinct was remorse. Poor fellas, I thought. Someone must’ve loved you [...] Read more »
For the last month and a half, I’ve been suffering from a guilt complex that manifests itself as writer’s block. I should be used to guilt complexes, given my Jewish roots, but for some reason this is different. Though I take time daily to search for jobs, even if its only a half-hour, whenever I [...] Read more »
“Hi, my name is Vladimir and I’m an addict.” “Hi Vladimir,” they chorused. A few of them mumbled, either because they couldn’t quite understand the name under my slight accent or because they simply couldn’t pronounce it through the chattering teeth of withdrawal. I scratched my leg nervously, the cup of coffee jittering in my [...] Read more »
My uncle Bruce and his girlfriend Alison who hosted Christmas dinner. This was the first time I’ve ever attended Christmas with my family. Forever the screwup, I tried to pickup Starbucks Gift Cards for my family on Erev Christmas. It wasn’t that I didn’t know what to get them, but that I was simply too [...] Read more »
Men are dogs. I don’t mean to say that men are conniving, lying cheaters who are destined to turn on their girlfriend, wife or lover. I mean that we’re trained animals. Read more »
(Image by Dan Winters) I was on Cloud 9 when I met you. It was incredible. Here we were in the stratosphere, so close your breath felt like a perfect breeze on my ear. I knew right then I was destined to fall for you. It started slowly at first, but how quickly it accelerated. [...] Read more »
“Have you seen the god damn ratings?” he screamed, his red power tie flailing as we cowered in our executive chairs. “The fucking Teletubbies are beating us! I don’t even know what a Boobah is!” Mack Herbovitz slammed his fist on the table, the small glasses of ice water rippling with the force of the [...] Read more »
I dreamt about you last night. I chased you up and down corridors, through apartments and operating rooms, and always you remained a step ahead. Eventually, you lost me. I wasn’t sure quite where I was. I tried to retrace my steps, but I had been watching you, not where I was going. And then [...] Read more »
An Ode to MacGyver There I stood, weak and weary, my smile askew, though slightly cheery, Carefully avoiding all the customers there in the store, In front of me, it sat their waiting, the challenge very much sedating, as the scale sat in parts spread across the storeroom floor. “What the fuck are all these [...] Read more »