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Worldwide Ace » One Night at the Walnut Brewery

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One Night at the Walnut Brewery

25 June, 2005 (00:08) | Women

She sneezed as I passed, nearly knocking her head into my shoulder. I turned to her and said, “you must be allergic to HOT. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. Please, accept my humblest apologies.”

She slapped me.


I don’t get how Ironman can be less confident than I am. He’s better looking than I am, smarter than I am, and certainly has a lot more beautiful lady friends than I do. Somehow, he still can’t seem to even have the semblance of relationships. This isn’t to say he doesn’t try, but he can’t even bring himself to ask a girl out. Tonight is a case and point.

Ironman, Little Bear and I went out to eat at the Walnut Brewery. Little Bear is in a committed relationship with his Smurfette, so already he’s got a leg up on the both of us. The majority of the evening, we talked about the various staff at the Walnut: who’s hotter; who’s cuter; who’s our type. Little Bear immediately made the statement that the head hostess was by far the best looking woman in the place. Ironman and I both contended that our waitress Ashley was far more attractive.

Just to give you an idea of what they looked like (and because keeps complaining I don’t talk about women like men normally do), Ashley was about 5’5″, highlighted brown hair, and deep brown eyes. She wore a lot of turquoise jewelry including two necklaces (one with many dangley bits) and earrings. She had a cute, squeaky voice and a brilliant smile. Her uniform didn’t really show off her body, but you could still tell she had nice size breasts, not large, but not small, and excellent curves.

The head hostess was about 5’10” with her heels. She had bleached blonde hair which looked to be naturally light brown. She definitely had the figure of stripper or model; large breasts, great legs and ass. Still, there was something about her that made her look just like any other blonde sorority sister. Which isn’t to say she wasn’t attractive, but that there just wasn’t anything setting her apart.

When I expressed the opinion that I found Ashley more attractive than the hostess, Ironman agreed. Little Bear immediately retorted, “you guys are crazy. Our waitress is hittable, but the hostess is PERFECT!”

“She may be hittable to you, but to me, she’s a miracle,” I said. Once again, Ironman agreed.

Throughout the evening, we continued to discuss and eventually decided that Ironman should ask Ashley out. Of course, Ironman, being the chicken that he is, didn’t. Little Bear even went as far as to recommend that he “just whip it out,” explaining that it had worked for him in the past (high school). Right… that’s just wrong.

Even so, it was quite obvious that Ashley was making far more eye contact with Little Bear and myself than with Ironman. Towards the end of the meal, I decided I’d ask her out, simply because Ironman couldn’t. We paid our bill and I headed to the bathroom while Little Bear and Ironman waited outside. On my way back from the bathroom, I glanced about looking for Ashley, but there was no sign of her. Perhaps I should’ve stayed and asked her out, but I decided just to go instead. Still, I don’t understand the fear. What’s the worst that happens? She says no.

Perhaps I’ll never understand. I, too, was once too afraid to ask a girl out. In some cases I still am. But at least I understand it’s an irrational fear and can overcome it when I really want to.

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  • If you’re sure the person at least likes you as a friend, then this will never happen.

  • If you’re sure the person at least likes you as a friend, then this will never happen.

  • btw, now that I’m done complaining. I agree with you.

  • btw, now that I’m done complaining. I agree with you.

  • thanks 🙂 i read back and agree with you as well.

    i’ve just noticed that guys who always need to feel validated by their peers seem to think that the best-looking women are the ones that society has assigned the title “hot.” aka paris hilton. most guys who are comfortable with themselves don’t find her attractive, but the vast majority of men (in america) would die to just be seen with her. deep down, they may not even find her pretty at all. but they’ll shout to the rooftops that she is, because that’s what everybody else is doing. remember when kate moss was so in? farrah fawcett? even clara bow? standards change, but men don’t. i’ll stop ranting now 🙂

  • thanks 🙂 i read back and agree with you as well.

    i’ve just noticed that guys who always need to feel validated by their peers seem to think that the best-looking women are the ones that society has assigned the title “hot.” aka paris hilton. most guys who are comfortable with themselves don’t find her attractive, but the vast majority of men (in america) would die to just be seen with her. deep down, they may not even find her pretty at all. but they’ll shout to the rooftops that she is, because that’s what everybody else is doing. remember when kate moss was so in? farrah fawcett? even clara bow? standards change, but men don’t. i’ll stop ranting now 🙂

  • You get a woman who comes along and is beautiful inside and out, and suddenly everyone is looking for women who share the appearance even though they may not share the brilliant personality or the stunning mannerisms that made the first one so special. It establishes a standard of beauty based solely on the physical despite that the ethereal is what’s truly attractive. I don’t think most men realize that it’s not how someone is similar to that currently socially accepted pinacle of beauty, but what makes a woman different from everyone else that’s really attractive.

  • You get a woman who comes along and is beautiful inside and out, and suddenly everyone is looking for women who share the appearance even though they may not share the brilliant personality or the stunning mannerisms that made the first one so special. It establishes a standard of beauty based solely on the physical despite that the ethereal is what’s truly attractive. I don’t think most men realize that it’s not how someone is similar to that currently socially accepted pinacle of beauty, but what makes a woman different from everyone else that’s really attractive.

  • that makes sense, i agree. however, i firmly believe that superficiality supercedes most, and i myself am guilty, but i also believe that as you get older and gain more experience this can change. most of the young guys i know are like that. girls, too. hell, i was! does that make sense? i’m high on coffee

  • that makes sense, i agree. however, i firmly believe that superficiality supercedes most, and i myself am guilty, but i also believe that as you get older and gain more experience this can change. most of the young guys i know are like that. girls, too. hell, i was! does that make sense? i’m high on coffee

  • this was in reference to strangers- friends are a whole different and equally bad type of rejection.

    Anyways I’m the person who’ll be certain someone likes them (as in they’ve even told me) and still somehow be terrified of rejection.

  • cool, I never thought of objectifying women as part of peer pressure… how mind-boggling.

  • this was in reference to strangers- friends are a whole different and equally bad type of rejection.

    Anyways I’m the person who’ll be certain someone likes them (as in they’ve even told me) and still somehow be terrified of rejection.

  • cool, I never thought of objectifying women as part of peer pressure… how mind-boggling.

  • I’m far more faraid of asking a friend out than a stranger, simply for the reason that it changes the dynamic of the relationship. You’ve got this fine status quo and you have to go fuck it up because of your crotch.

    Of course, if they say yes, the relationship is generally (in my experience) better than it would’ve been with a stranger.

  • I’m far more faraid of asking a friend out than a stranger, simply for the reason that it changes the dynamic of the relationship. You’ve got this fine status quo and you have to go fuck it up because of your crotch.

    Of course, if they say yes, the relationship is generally (in my experience) better than it would’ve been with a stranger.

  • yah exactly- there’s the terrible fear of losing the relationship all together

  • yah exactly- there’s the terrible fear of losing the relationship all together

  • RE: the “idiot” statement, watch the commentary, you don’t know me, and were not privy to the conversation.

    First, I did not yell at you. Second, what I asked for was a demonstration of interest in the girls you were supposedly attracted to. The example I gave you was of a friend of mine admiring the adorable smallness of his girlfriend’s t-shirts while he was doing her laundry. A far cry from “she had nice, round tits.”

  • RE: the “idiot” statement, watch the commentary, you don’t know me, and were not privy to the conversation.

    First, I did not yell at you. Second, what I asked for was a demonstration of interest in the girls you were supposedly attracted to. The example I gave you was of a friend of mine admiring the adorable smallness of his girlfriend’s t-shirts while he was doing her laundry. A far cry from “she had nice, round tits.”

  • I was kinda worried I would get in trouble for that… I tried to hint there was probably some confusion but I did a bad job. I did not mean to call you personally an idiot. Just in theory a girl who would yell at a guy for not objectifying women, which apparently you didn’t do.

    But yeah I agree. Definitely let a girl know you’re interested by letting her know she looks nice.

  • I was kinda worried I would get in trouble for that… I tried to hint there was probably some confusion but I did a bad job. I did not mean to call you personally an idiot. Just in theory a girl who would yell at a guy for not objectifying women, which apparently you didn’t do.

    But yeah I agree. Definitely let a girl know you’re interested by letting her know she looks nice.

  • so basically you have to know the difference between speaking “crudely” to your “buds” about womens’ appearances, and telling women “nicely” that you appreciate how they look.

  • so basically you have to know the difference between speaking “crudely” to your “buds” about womens’ appearances, and telling women “nicely” that you appreciate how they look.

  • it’s cool… You were mislead by Ben… It’s all his fault really….

  • it’s cool… You were mislead by Ben… It’s all his fault really….

  • By honestly describing the appearance of an individual, I don’t think that it is necessarilly objectifying. Girls who like girls do the same thing to each other–have you ever heard of Peaches? Have you never judged an individual or have observed something humiliating and “honest” about that person? I think its human nature to take all of these into account–which explains why advertising and visual media will always have sexually stimulating proteges integrated into their marketing campaigns. In order for humans to not observe certain things or profit from crouch motivataion (ie;fliritng + eye contact=big tips) you would have to reprogram the human pysche.

  • By honestly describing the appearance of an individual, I don’t think that it is necessarilly objectifying. Girls who like girls do the same thing to each other–have you ever heard of Peaches? Have you never judged an individual or have observed something humiliating and “honest” about that person? I think its human nature to take all of these into account–which explains why advertising and visual media will always have sexually stimulating proteges integrated into their marketing campaigns. In order for humans to not observe certain things or profit from crouch motivataion (ie;fliritng + eye contact=big tips) you would have to reprogram the human pysche.

  • Just ’cause it’s human nature doesn’t make it excusable. That’s what separates us from animals, that we have the ability to overcome our inborn instincts for the purpose of what’s proper in our culture.

    And yes, honestly describing what you see objectively is not objectifying a total person, as long as that’s not all you see. My complaint is when men (and even women) “honestly describe” women in a vulgar way. Even if it is human nature, keep it to yourself!

  • Just ’cause it’s human nature doesn’t make it excusable. That’s what separates us from animals, that we have the ability to overcome our inborn instincts for the purpose of what’s proper in our culture.

    And yes, honestly describing what you see objectively is not objectifying a total person, as long as that’s not all you see. My complaint is when men (and even women) “honestly describe” women in a vulgar way. Even if it is human nature, keep it to yourself!

  • good job, ben,
    I think you have accumulated the most comments on a post I have seen on any postings that weren’t specifically in a group. So, I’m throwing in this one more to sweeten the deal a little.

  • good job, ben,
    I think you have accumulated the most comments on a post I have seen on any postings that weren’t specifically in a group. So, I’m throwing in this one more to sweeten the deal a little.

  • Don’t toast me just yet. A friend of mine had 130 comments on one of her posts. Admitedly, it was because she had a conversation with a friend on there, but still…

    Most of the time, it’s just controversy that breeds comments.

  • Don’t toast me just yet. A friend of mine had 130 comments on one of her posts. Admitedly, it was because she had a conversation with a friend on there, but still…

    Most of the time, it’s just controversy that breeds comments.