Get Ready for Hypocrisy
So all day long, I’ve been contemplating bitching about the internet. And admittedly, I probably break some of these internet idioms, so feel free to point out my hypocrisy to me, since I need to work on this stuff too. That being said, I highly recommend that none of you read this, as it’s a mass of angry drivel that works better as a way for me to vent, then as something worth looking over.
- I fucking hate self-important people who think they’re the know-all end-all of the internet. I can use Google too. Sure, I appreciate an amusing link or an interesting site you come across, BUT IT’S NOT YOUR SITE! Do not act as though you are solely responsible for it! Give credit where credit is due. It’s no different than citing a paper you write.
- I’m a geek, and I bask lavishly in it. That being said, I’m so fucking sick of Lord of the Rings this, Anime that. Obscure knowledge is fantastic, but it’s NOT relevant to everything! Thanks for knowing WAY TOO MUCH SHIT about supremely crappy science fiction. Congratulations! You’re the #1 Angel fan in YOUR FUCKING HOUSE! Get over it. I do not need to hear how Terri Schiavo is just like that one Vampire on Buffy, or how the pope would’ve lived if he had drank from the bottle marked “Drink Me!” from Alice in Wonderland. I do not care that the black dude from 24 would be a better President than Bush, and I could give a crap if your MegaZord would’ve won the Iraq war overnight. Fandom has its place; FAR AWAY FROM ME!In fact, while we’re at it, let’s extend this to the real world too. I do not need to hear about how the gay black guy was so, like stereotyped on The Real World when discussing the way the media discriminates against African-Americans. MTV is not the fucking media. It’s crap. Stop watching it. I do not want to hear about how you’re going through the same thing as that skinny bitch on the OC when we’re discussing the psychological impacts of Hitchcock’s Rope. Jesus.
- Everybody and their sister has bitched about this one, but I’m sick of fucking Emo. I’m sick of people who listen to shoegazer claiming they’re punk. I’m sick of crappy whiny poetry. I’m sick of “popular” kids listing geek Emo shit in their interests. BE FUCKING ORIGINAL. There are 8 Billion people on Earth, and at least 200 Million with internet access. If you don’t realize you repeating the same fucking shit as everyone else, you’ve got some serious tunnel vision. I know you aren’t going to have everything you say be original since almost everything has been done before, but at least try and not look like the other half a million people exactly like you. The least you can do is provide a solid explanation. If you say “I love Rainbow Brite” and can’t explain why, why you talked about it, or why it’s cool, then you’ve got verbal fucking diarrhea. Anything you say or believe, you should be able to explain the importance of. If you can’t, don’t say it.
- i hate when people type everything in lower case and never capitalize. even when starting a new sentence they neglect it. and yes, i know that you, , do it because it’s become second nature due to your job, but the rest of you have no fucking excuse (that section was in all caps except i’m not using capitals. as its been said elsewhere:
Capitalization is the difference between helping your uncle jack off a horse and helping your uncle Jack off a horse.
- while were at it i hate people who leave out punctuation grammar inflection and any other linguistic conventions that allow us to understand each other while writing its a pain in the ass to try and punctuate as you go because of how wrong people usually get it also you are not faulkner split up your sentences and don’t let one reach the same length as the mountain in guatamala i think its called xuaxutahun that reaches from slightly below sea level in a valley to way up high above where birds can fly and i know this because i once climbed up and could watch the birds flying below me but it was hard to breathe so i didn’t and then we came back down KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF!
- 1337 $P34K i$ foR 515$1eS 4nD N1MROd5. 1+ 1$ not c0Ol. I+ 1$ no+ phuN. 1t Is NO+ 4nY+h1N9 MoR3 +H4N coMMOn 1D1OCY W1+H 4 T0UCH 0F 93eK 4dDED IN. 4nd WHILe W3’R3 4t I+, KN0cK IT 0PhF witH tho53 phUckiNg nE+ AB8rEV14TiOn5. I+’5 NOt 4, i+’S for. It’S noT U, I+’$ you. J00 MEReLY l0ok lIke 4 DuMB4S5 +rYIn9 +o +yPE LiK3 +H1$.And in plain English: Elite speak is for sissies and nimrods. It’s not cool. It’s not fun. It’s not anything more than common idiocy with a touch of geek added in. And, while we’re at it, knock it off with those fucking net abbreviations. It’s not 4, it’s for. It’s not U, it’s you. You merely look like a dumbass trying to type like this.
- This week, I went on a posting rampage for no apparent reason. Still, I only posted five entries in the last seven days and only once did I post twice in a day. Posting five times in one day if you have nothing substantial to say does not make you loved. It pisses me off. One recap a day, I can understand, even if nothing substantial adds on, but more than that, and you better have a good reason for posting, be it because it’s amusing, because you have something to discuss, or because something major happened. I know we all think we’re interesting because mankind is inherently narcissistic, even those who are self-loathing. If you’re willing to sit there and bad-mouth yourself, it’s because you think it’s interesting. It may well be, THE FIRST TIME!
- I’m sick of people who make icons from real life, complete with friends, significant others, and statements that don’t apply on the internet. Perhaps it’s just me in my anger, but the internet is made mostly of horny single people, and we don’t need it rubbed in that you found someone. This is the same logic behind the idea that I don’t want to see you slobbering over your boy or girl while riding the bus, sitting in the park, or wandering through the library. A mention here or there, fine, but good god, show some respect for the single.
And I’m spent.
But, just for good measure, bitch bitch bitch, moan moan moan, whine whine whine.