The End of PVS (Persistant Vegitative State)
Terri Schiavo died today. Again. It’s odd. The first time she died, it was from bulemia. This time, it was because of forced anorexia.
Here’s the obituary I read on the air for her:
The wait is over. After nearly two weeks without her feeding tube, Terri Schiavo died this morning. Schiavo had been in a persistent vegetative state due to the eating disorder bulimia since 1990. Despite the rulings of six state courts in favor of pulling her feeding tube, republican politicians including Florida governor Jeb bush, majority leader tom delay, and president George W Bush all opposed the measure and were attempting to block it. Terri Schiavo was 26. Her body was 41.
Comments
Comment from vixen_shtorat
Time: April 1, 2005, 11:32 am
I feel compelled to do this:
Comment from bassist
Time: April 1, 2005, 11:59 am
There were certainly more humanitarian ways to put her out of her misery. Unfortunately, it seems most of them conflicted with hippocratic oath and would’ve violated laws, making the medical personnel responsable for murder. It’s amazning what a few laws preventing euthanasia will do…
God, I miss Dr. Jack…
Comment from bassist
Time: April 1, 2005, 11:59 am
Yeah, I saw it when you posted it. It’s phenomenal. It’s also in very poor taste, but what about this case isn’t?
Comment from vixen_shtorat
Time: April 1, 2005, 2:48 pm
True, true.
Sadly, I am eagerly awaiting the update on the journal.. or to see if it’ll just never happened again.
That’d be even more hilarious.
I am going to hell.
Comment from bassist
Time: April 1, 2005, 3:57 pm
Everyone is going to hell. It’s why hell is endothermic.
Comment from im_such_a_slav
Time: April 3, 2005, 3:47 am
are you sure you dont mean exothermic?
Comment from bassist
Time: April 3, 2005, 1:19 pm
You’re right. I mixed up endothermic and exothermic. Though the proof has been attributed to many sources, the earliest I heard of it was from my dad and several of his classmates who ran across it while they were at MIT in the 60s (note that they don’t know who wrote it, but it’s been around longer than many of urban legends say it has).
First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion on average, we can predict that all people and all souls go to hell on average. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. Thus, there are two possible conditions:
- If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, than the temperature and pressure in hell will increase exponentially until all hell breaks loose.
-OR-
- If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.
We can solve this (de)lemma with the 1990 postulation of Ms. Theresa LeClair [name varies in different tellings], the woman who lived across the hall from me in first year residence. Since I have still not been successful in obtaining sexual relations with her, I know that condition two has not been met, and thus it can be concluded that condition one is true, and therefore that hell is exothermic.
Comment from im_such_a_slav
Time: April 4, 2005, 5:17 am
I ran across a different one in college. It was a bit more theoretically complete, but unfortunately lacked this very convincing refutation of condition 2.
It is amazing how a bit of humerous nonsense can really make otherwise dry facts stick in ones memory. If only all of thermodynamics could be this fun…
Comment from psychotik
Time: April 1, 2005, 12:32 am
i have no problem with her dying…
but i have a problem with us starving her to death. that’s fucked up. this is a prime case of where euthinasia is key. i know i didn’t spell that right, but you get the jist.