Worldwide Ace

As I was walking my fat ass home, I passed three kids (well, college students, but obviously young and immature) sitting in folding chair in the sun outside their house. One of the girls was slightly chubby, but cute, the other was really hot. With them was a scraggly wanna-be hippie boy. I walked past, trying not to stare, but as I past by, the boy said, “She really wants you, man.”

Obviously, this was a full frontal attack on me as they all giggled, so I turned, looked slyly at the boy while continuing to back away and said, “I’m flattered, but I’m also gay. You’re cute though. Want to go for stroll little man?”

The girls fell out of their chairs laughing, but the boy obviously wasn’t happy about it. He began to stand up, but I turned and just kept walking.