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Worldwide Ace » Good Deeds?

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Good Deeds?

3 September, 2004 (11:28) | Social Commentary

This morning, my first day of semi-health back, I biked to the bus stop and caught the bus to campus. While waiting for the bus, a young mother and her child arrived at the stop as well. When the bus pulled up, I carried the stroller (pram for you Brits) up onto the bus for her and then went back out and put my bike on the rack.

Why?

I like to think of myself as a good guy. I try to be helpful when I can, but I don’t understand why I do random acts of kindness. Sometimes, I do good things because it makes me feel good to do them; sometimes, because I feel it’s my responsibility; sometimes, in order to receive a reward. Today, though, there really wasn’t any reason to help out.

When the bus stopped at the Pearl Street Mall, I helped the lady off and then returned to the bus. As I sat down, it shocked me to think that I had no reason to do that. Aren’t I supposed to be a self-centered bastard? Why do I hold doors, or even assist in things I don’t need to?

Even beyond that, how come some people see me as an offensive asshole and others as a sweet, nice guy? I know I’m an asshole at times and I’m nice at times, but it bothers me that people pigeonhole me into one category or another.

So let me ask you? Why are you nice to people? What do you get out of it?

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  • i think being nice just feels good. it feels good to know you made someone’s day a little bit better. i am definately a “do unto others” type, and i know it makes me smile when people are nice just for the sake of being nice.

  • i think being nice just feels good. it feels good to know you made someone’s day a little bit better. i am definately a “do unto others” type, and i know it makes me smile when people are nice just for the sake of being nice.

  • Because it’s the right thing to do. In the long run, being mean will always have repercussions. I get satisfaction out of knowing that I’ve done the right thing, even if I don’t always get recognized for it.

  • Because it’s the right thing to do. In the long run, being mean will always have repercussions. I get satisfaction out of knowing that I’ve done the right thing, even if I don’t always get recognized for it.

  • The benefits of being “nice” outweigh the benefits of being selfish. It cuts down on stress for others, it can get you things sometimes, it can make you feel happier which relieves stress and therefore benefits your health, etc.
    Being an asshole has the tendency to build stress for you and others which can lead to unecessary confrontations, which wastes time and energy, which can build more stress which blah blah blah.

    Anyway, nice is just, well, nicer.

  • The benefits of being “nice” outweigh the benefits of being selfish. It cuts down on stress for others, it can get you things sometimes, it can make you feel happier which relieves stress and therefore benefits your health, etc.
    Being an asshole has the tendency to build stress for you and others which can lead to unecessary confrontations, which wastes time and energy, which can build more stress which blah blah blah.

    Anyway, nice is just, well, nicer.

  • In the hope of good karma sending some of it back my way…. And because it pisses me off when strangers are mean to me for no reason, so I figure I shouldn’t be to them either…

  • In the hope of good karma sending some of it back my way…. And because it pisses me off when strangers are mean to me for no reason, so I figure I shouldn’t be to them either…

  • Some people think I’m an asshole too, but those people are just angry.

    When I do things that are like “random acts of kindness” I usually figure that if I do it, it might be the beginning of a connection with someone. But that if I don’t do it then I know I won’t get anything out of it. Even if it doesn’t open a door, at least I did something good for someone, and that (for reasons that are inherent to human nature) makes me feel good.

    Some philosophical types make arguments like “HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU DIDN’T DIDN’T HELP A NEO-NAZI ON THE BUS?!?! YOU WOULDN’T HAVE HELPED HITLER OPEN A JAR OF KRAUT, WOULD YOU?!?!” Those people are usually the kind of angry people that hate me, ironically.

    In general, people want to form connections with other people, and things like that is like being a friendly dog vs. a men barking dog. You throw off the friendly dog vibe, and people want to come up and pet you.

  • Some people think I’m an asshole too, but those people are just angry.

    When I do things that are like “random acts of kindness” I usually figure that if I do it, it might be the beginning of a connection with someone. But that if I don’t do it then I know I won’t get anything out of it. Even if it doesn’t open a door, at least I did something good for someone, and that (for reasons that are inherent to human nature) makes me feel good.

    Some philosophical types make arguments like “HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU DIDN’T DIDN’T HELP A NEO-NAZI ON THE BUS?!?! YOU WOULDN’T HAVE HELPED HITLER OPEN A JAR OF KRAUT, WOULD YOU?!?!” Those people are usually the kind of angry people that hate me, ironically.

    In general, people want to form connections with other people, and things like that is like being a friendly dog vs. a men barking dog. You throw off the friendly dog vibe, and people want to come up and pet you.

  • i agree with that, 100%. sometimes, you end up walking in the same direction after you help them pick up that stuff they dropped. then, you might end up talking. etc, etc.

  • i agree with that, 100%. sometimes, you end up walking in the same direction after you help them pick up that stuff they dropped. then, you might end up talking. etc, etc.

  • What do you get out of it?!?!?! Cookies duh!

  • What do you get out of it?!?!?! Cookies duh!

  • You can use them like disposable cock rings if you’re clever.

  • You can use them like disposable cock rings if you’re clever.

  • sometimes, if I am nice I get a burrito. besides if you are nice people will be nice back at you. However, it is sometimes better when people are a little bit mean–because you know that they are not being superficial and that they are not being nice because they have to. in other words, its only worth being nice if you really mean it–but meaness and selfishness can be good sometimes (hehe, I am a business major).

  • sometimes, if I am nice I get a burrito. besides if you are nice people will be nice back at you. However, it is sometimes better when people are a little bit mean–because you know that they are not being superficial and that they are not being nice because they have to. in other words, its only worth being nice if you really mean it–but meaness and selfishness can be good sometimes (hehe, I am a business major).

  • There’s one side of me that feels I’m not nice enough, and one side of me that wants people to think highly of me. And then there’s also the side of me that feels for someone else.. that it’s just right to help. I wouldn’t want to feel ignored. Treat others as you wish to be treated, I suppose.

  • There’s one side of me that feels I’m not nice enough, and one side of me that wants people to think highly of me. And then there’s also the side of me that feels for someone else.. that it’s just right to help. I wouldn’t want to feel ignored. Treat others as you wish to be treated, I suppose.

  • anonymous

    I do it just cause I like being nice. I don’t think there are enough nice people in the world. I also try to smile lots, I love when things make me smile. I guess I just have this inate cheerful and nice thing going on.

    Hmm…I am wondering if I should just let you figure out who this is..ah wtf, it’s Steph. Hi! *waves*

  • anonymous

    I do it just cause I like being nice. I don’t think there are enough nice people in the world. I also try to smile lots, I love when things make me smile. I guess I just have this inate cheerful and nice thing going on.

    Hmm…I am wondering if I should just let you figure out who this is..ah wtf, it’s Steph. Hi! *waves*