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Worldwide Ace » The Requisite Airline Post – Part 2: Screwing the Pooch

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The Requisite Airline Post – Part 2: Screwing the Pooch

31 May, 2008 (02:31) | Travelogue

I guess it’s inevitable that I would make a mistake somewhere along the way. I never would’ve guessed it would happen right off the bat.

How to screw the pooch:

  1. Forget your CD player in the car.
  2. Despite having it returned to you, forget it at your friend’s apartment immediately thereafter cause you were too dumb to pack it.
  3. Pack two blank books to write in so you won’t have to use your laptop in cramped quarters all the time, and then promptly realize you packed them in your checked baggage, forcing you to use your ginormous laptop while the tiny Korean boy keeps the seat in front of you all the way back.
  4. Cancel your cell phone service and have it cut out at the beginning of the last day you wanted service.
  5. Skip the supermarket for ethical reasons (I will not shop at Wal-Mart), meaning you have no shampoo, conditioner, mouthwash or airborne (as requested by Denise).
  6. Call your parents and leave a message that’s too long for the answering machine.

At least for now, those are my successful fuck-ups. On the upside, everything else seems smooth right now.

I’m currently somewhere just southwest of Juneau Alaska, two and a half hours into the flight from San Francisco to Incheon/Seoul. I’ve been using my headphones to listen to the bad satellite radio the plane receives and reading Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar. I’ve watched Jumper, which was weak, and will watch Charlie Wilson’s War or Grace is Gone next. If everything goes to plane, I’ll likely end up watching 4 movies, but who knows. Regardless, I need to preserve battery life.

Oh, and note to self: there is no wireless on the plane dumbass.

It’s now 8:45 into this extremely long flight. I just finished watching 27 Dresses. I’m not sure whether to be embarrassed by this. I thought it was highly enjoyable.

The tiny Korean kid still won’t put his seat up. There’s too much turbulence to walk around and my legs are getting very sore. I just feigned needing the bathroom so I could stretch (the stewards asked me to sit back down due to the shaking.

We’re somewhere near Sapporo right now. Most of today, the sun has been too bright to see out the window. About an hour ago, though, I was able to see a Japan-like rocky island. Not sure if it’s a Chinese island further north based on the map of our trajectory.

I’m sure this entry will be full of typos until I edit and post it later. I can’t actually see the screen due to the severe angle it’s at right now. I asked to use one of the steward seats to type in for a a few minutes, but it’s FAA regulations that no passengers can sit there. Disappointing, for sure, but I can understand not being able to change stupid corporate policies.

When I get to Seoul, I hope I have enough time to hop online and post this. Lord knows they’ll have WiFi. Given how quickly I changed planes in San Francisco, the odds aren’t necessarily high.

HOLY SHIT! The Korean kid got up. I’ve now straightened his chair for the second time this flight. Ah, precious leg room. And I can see the screen! Sadly, this joy will be fleeting.

It seems all I do on airplanes is eat, sleep, read and watch movies. I’m about 70 pages into Plato and a Platypus. It’s entertaining, but since I’m trying to actually remember the philosophies they’re referencing, I’m taking my time.

Books I brought with me: Plato and a Platypus, Darkly Dreaming Dexter, Invisible Monsters, Choke, Friedrich Nietzsche (but I don’t remember the name right now), Still Life With Woodpecker, a guidebook to Southeast Asia (I left the Europe one with Hulse) and two blank books. I figure I can finish Plato and a Platypus and give it to Denise. Nietzsche is for the extended stay in Guam.

My headphones broke. Perhaps it’s a blessing in disguise. When I got up to use the bathroom, they got caught in between the raised arm and the seat, snapping one side. They still function and a little tape should fix them well enough for use, but without a CD player, what’s the point anyway. I’ll likely get a new CD player and headphones in the Philippines, assuming MP3 CD players are available cheap.

The Korean Kid is back, and I’m afraid he’ll drop his seat and crush my lappy, so away it goes again.

I was dead on. Not 30 seconds after sliding my laptop down next to me, my knees were crushed by the Korean Kid.

As is to be expected, I didn’t take the time to chat with the cute high school age Korean girl sitting next to me until the last half hour of the flight. She apparently spent the last ten months in Arizona as part of a foreign exchange program. Her English was pretty good, so that was nice, but I still can’t pronounce her name (something like Heh-djinn).

The flight got in an hour early, and despite having to go through security again, it was a surprisingly smooth transition to the next terminal. Instead of removing footwear or anything, they just had us walk through and manually scanned if you beeped. My belt did not set it off.

As I headed towards the gate, I spotted a free internet lounge. It was full of people from all over. There was a gentleman in a red turban, a very cute middle eastern girl, and plenty of Europeans and Asians. Unfortunately, there weren’t any seats left.

So here I am, waiting for my last leg before catching up with Denise. It’s about 4:30 PM here, so still early afternoon. My flight doesn’t leave until nearly 8. If I had thought of it, I might’ve tried to go grab some grub in Seoul, but it would take too long.

I’m testing this entry on the post by email system, so bear with me if there are any errors (Update: it didn’t work. Manually posting). I don’t know if it’ll take html code in the email. I’m also testing my power converter kit (thanks Dad), which seems to be working wonderfully.

And when the hell did airports become glorified malls? I don’t want to shop!



  • Sara

    You left cd player here? I see it not πŸ™

  • Sara

    You left cd player here? I see it not πŸ™